Another Bad Weekend
Ok promise I won’t talk about shopping at the supermarket in this blog lol – only because we didn’t go! However…
We visited Kirst’s Mum, Dad & Sister who hadn’t seen Kirst from before she went to Budapest to have her teeth done and they were impressed with the result. It was nice to catch up with them and they are getting more used to seeing and supporting Kirst.
I felt I needed a bit of a mood lift so suggested we go to a new outlet shop that has opened near us. Now those who know Kirst know if you get her in a clothes or shoe shop you’ll have a lot of effort to get her out before she buys everything. This wasn’t the case this time. We had only been in the shop a few minutes at most when Kirst said she had to get out of the shop and couldn’t be in there as she looked disgusting and off she went back to the car.
Again the feeling of the beard shadow coming through was the reason and she just felt she looked like a man and felt people were looking at her and she couldn’t cope. We had to get some food so I suggested we went to M&S as its a small shop but when we got there Kirst couldn’t go in and stayed in the car whilst I got some bits and pieces.
No one unless another transexual can fully understand the impact of what I saw as a very faint beard shadow on the person. It totally makes them feel awful, depressed and that they can’t blend in with ‘normal’ people as they feel they don’t look like a woman. Believe me the impact is real! I felt Kirst was feeling so low that I drafted in some support.
One of our friends who is just a little further on than Kirst and has gone through the first month of having the implant and is now taking estrogen came over on Sunday. She had said to Kirst to expect these feelings and effects but you always hope they won’t happen to you but they have. It was good to have her here and explain that after a few weeks she will start to feel up again when she starts taking the estrogen – just needs to get through the next few weeks.
I asked what her partner feels and how she handles it – she went off abroad with her friends and left her to it lol. Hmm maybe I ought to do the same lol !
Anyway its good to know that all should be ok in a few weeks – I’ll just be buying extra vodka to help me through it lol!